Varsity 2008 record: 9-3 (6-2 SEC)

In the Chelsea football coaches’ office, there is a small hand-painted sign with a simple but meaningful four-word message: Friday night means football.  From August through November, that message drives the weekly routines of thousands of high school football players in Michigan; from the beginning of Monday practice through the inimitable moment at which those athletes run onto the field against the backdrop of a setting sun and amidst the spectacle of what is a major community event in many towns, those four words are the motto that brings into profound focus the motivation for enduring the hottest preseason two-a-days and the coldest postseason practices.  Why spend hours under the scorching August sun?  Because Friday night means football.  Why toil in a frigid November snow flurry?  Because Friday night means football.  There is no other sport with such a singular weekly focal point; there is no other sport that defines one night so irrevocably as its very own.  In autumn there is no ambiguity; there is only one night with one unmistakable meaning: Friday night means football.

Sadly, not all schools observe this important tradition; sometimes an opposing team forces a change to the schedule, choosing to play not on Friday night but instead on Saturday afternoon.  Earlier this decade it was Farmington Hills Harrison forcing Chelsea to alter its calendar; this year, in the state regionals, it was a team the Bulldogs had never before faced in football: Inkster.  And if that wasn’t bad enough for all us Friday night folk, the situation got a little more confusing: a facilities issue prompted Inkster to move the game to Romulus, a city which is neither Inkster nor Chelsea.  (Hey, all the cities blur together when you get east of Ypsilanti.  If these things aren’t spelled out, I get lost.)

Look!  His hair is cold!  It’s turning blue!

The 2008 season marked Chelsea’s third consecutive trip to the state regionals; unfortunately, the two previous trips didn’t end well, and Chelsea was still looking for its first consecutive regional championship.  This game didn’t promise to be any easier than the last two: not only was it an away game — the previous two had been home games — but Inkster came into the game on a nine-game winning streak, including two playoff wins by a combined score of 102-0.  In other words, the Inkster Vikings were as good at football as the Actual Vikings were at colonizing Europe.  (They weren’t as good at football as the Actual Vikings were at wearing amazing horned helmets, because as disappointing as it may be, it turns out the Actual Vikings didn’t really wear amazing horned helmets.  What would the Purple People Eaters think of that?)

On a cold November day under cold gray November skies and in a cold November rain/sleet/snow mix — did I mention it was November? — Chelsea kicked off to Inkster, and the Vikings held onto the ball for the next three hours.  Well, okay, it wasn’t three hours, but it felt like three hours: they held the ball for eight minutes — a full one-sixth of the game — before colonizing the end zone to take an early 8-0 lead.  Chelsea handed the ball 12 times to Nick Hill as part of a 13-play drive, but the drive stalled just outside the Inkster 20; the 40-yard field goal attempt fell short, and Inkster took over at the 20.  But if the Vikings’ first drive was crazy long, their second drive was crazy short: they went three and out and were forced to punt.

Tyler Fischaber would like to show you to the turf.

Pat Dignan doesn’t feel cold; he feels only wins and losses.

“I don’t care what Ebert & Roeper said; I’m giving Quantum of Solace two thumbs up.”

Once again, Chelsea put together a strong drive, using 11 plays to move inside Inkster’s 20; once again, the drive stalled, this time on a fumble at the 15.  To make matters worse, Inkster returned the fumble inside the Chelsea 40 and took full advantage of the Bulldogs’ gift by scoring a touchdown to go up 16-0 with a minute and a half left in the second quarter.  That proved to be enough time for Chelsea to move to the Inkster 15 but the Vikings intercepted a second-down pass at the goal line with 12 seconds left to end the threat and the half.

The Bulldogs received the ball to start the second half, but this time they didn’t get a chance to move the ball into Inkster territory: Hill took the kickoff 81 yards for a touchdown to cut Inkster’s lead down to 16-6.  After that burst of excitement, the teams settled down into a quarter’s worth of relatively short possessions that were as threatening as a lethargic kitten sitting on a stack of Barry Manilow albums; neither side came close to scoring, and Inkster took its 10-point lead into the fourth quarter.

Nick Hill doesn’t appreciate your invading his personal space.

When the coach says “huddle,” this isn’t what he means.

Early McGowan will be on time.  You can count on it.

The first half of the fourth quarter was consumed by another three-hour Inkster drive, but this time the drive ended in a punt.  Chelsea took over on its own eight and moved all of seven yards before fumbling the ball away; with five and a half minutes to play and Inkster on Chelsea’s 16, the Bulldogs’ chances for a comeback seemed faint at best.  But the Vikings helped turn the volume back up when they fumbled the ball right back, and Chelsea had four minutes to put a dent in Inkster’s lead; three minutes later, that’s exactly what they did thanks to a 13-yard Michael Roberts touchdown run.  The extra point cut Inkster’s lead to three, but that would still be a difficult lead to overcome: there was only a minute left in the game, so the Bulldogs’ hopes rested on a successful recovery of their onside kick — something that happens only about 21 percent of the time in the NFL.

“Hey!  Look up there!  It’s a Northwest jet!”

When Early McGowan and George Clark are happy, you’d better be happy, too.

Cody Schiller really, really likes snow.

After the … wait, what?  The Bulldogs recovered the onside kick?  Hey, they did!  How about that.  So, as I was saying, after Chelsea recovered the onside kick, the Bulldog offense took the field with a chance to pull even — or to take the lead.  It didn’t look good at first: three no-gainers left Chelsea with a fourth and 10.  But Roberts threw to Jake Mantel for the first down, and the Bulldogs had a first down and another chance; three plays later, Roberts lofted a pass to Steven O’Keefe at the five, and it looked like Chelsea would score the winning touchdown … until an Inkster defender reached O’Keefe right after the ball did: his bone-crunching, teeth-rattling hit knocked the ball loose, leaving Chelsea with another fourth down.  Roberts’ final pass fell incomplete, and Inkster took over with eight seconds left; one knee later, Chelsea’s season came to an end with a 13-16 loss.

Leftovers:

• Each of Chelsea’s three first-half drives made it inside the Inkster 25, but each of those three drives ended with zero points (missed field goal, fumble, interception).
• Inkster entered the game with a high-flying reputation for scoring enough points to bail out Wall Street: the Vikings had scored over 40 points in six games to that point.  But the Chelsea defense not only held them to 16 points, but also held them scoreless in the second half.
• Nick Hill rushed 35 times for 182 yards, giving him a season total of 279 rushes for 2,090 yards and 24 rushing touchdowns (along with two kick returns for touchdowns); that gives him an average of 7.5 yards per carry.  His all-purpose yardage total was 2,773, which accounts for a little over half of Chelsea’s total all-purpose yardage (5,193).
• Full photo gallery.

Next week:
I’m sorry; your call cannot be completed as dialed.  Please check the number and call back next August.

Varsity 2008 record: 9-2 (6-2 SEC)

Chelsea’s high-voltage fuse-blowing pun-inducing win over Milan sent the Bulldogs on to face the Bulldogs.  But as much fun as an intrasquad playoff scrimmage sounded, the Other Bulldogs weren’t from Chelsea; instead, they were from Mason.  (Also, Mason Bulldogs are blue and red, which just makes them purple waiting to happen.)

Those who recall a bit of the history of Chelsea football will remember Mason as a fairly regular nonconference opponent; the two teams met 14 times between 1972 and 1997, and the series ended up a remarkably even 7-7.  Mason disappeared from Chelsea’s regular-season schedule after the 1997 season, never to be seen again … until the whimsical hand of the MHSAA playoffs reunited the teams in 2002 (which was a nice change from its habit of scheduling conference teams).  As most every Chelsea fan remembers, being reunited didn’t feel so good for Chelsea; on a miserably cold and snowy night in Mason, the Ersatz Bulldogs used a fourth-quarter fumblerooski to score the winning touchdown, and the Genuine Bulldogs went home with a mild case of frostbite and a severe case of That Was Annoying.

In a binary football game, this would be the two yard line.

Chelsea had much higher hopes for the 2008 Meeting of the Bulldogs, but one thing would be the same: the game would again be at Mason thanks to the MHSAA playoff points formula, which used its mysterious powers to deem Mason the better set of Bulldogs.  They weren’t that much better, though: the difference was a mere .112 (89.778 to 89.666), which, in terms of playoff rankings, made Mason better then Chelsea only to the degree that Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups are better than Reese’s Pieces.  That slim difference led everybody to anticipate a tasty, tasty clash not of chocolate and peanut butter, but of two good teams.

Like any good host would do, Mason let Chelsea have the ball first, and Chelsea express its gratitude by moving efficiently inside Mason’s 30.  The drive stalled before Chelsea could do any damage, but Mason punted the ball right back after a swift three and out; again, Chelsea moved the ball efficiently, and this time the drive didn’t stall: Nick Hill took the ball in from the three to give Chelsea a 7-0 lead.

Nick Hill cuts like a knife through the tension of your defense.

How happy is George Clark?  So happy!

Mason’s offensive woes continued with another three and out, but Chelsea couldn’t get past the 50; after a solid Michael Roberts punt pinned Mason at its own 13, Mason finally found offensive success.  But that success didn’t extend all the way down the field: Mason had a first and goal but failed to reach the end zone, so the kicker came out to cut into Chelsea’s lead.  There was, however, one small problem: the ball didn’t actually go through the uprights, and Chelsea’s lead stayed right where it was.

…But it didn’t stay there for long.  On second and 5 from the Mason 44, Roberts lofted a 44-yard touchdown pass to Jake Mantel to double Chelsea’s lead.  Mason pushed the ball past midfield but soon had to punt, and Chelsea took over with two minutes left in the half and a chance to extend its lead; however, Roberts’ 37 yard field goal fell short, leaving Chelsea’s halftime lead at 14.

It’s a good thing for Michael Roberts that this isn’t the comic strip Peanuts.

Kevin Rosentreter only has eyes for you.

Mason got the ball to start the second half with the goal of reducing Chelsea’s lead with some sort of score; however, a three and out isn’t worth any points under current football rules, so that goal went unfulfilled.  But Chelsea responded with its own three and out, and a 36-yard punt return gave Mason the ball inside Chelsea’s 20.  This time Mason accomplished its goal with a one-yard touchdown run, and Chelsea’s lead was down to seven.

Both Chelsea and Mason staged drives that chewed up the rest of the third quarter but resulted in no points, and early in the fourth quarter, Mason punted the ball away.  Chelsea took over on its own 11 and handed the ball to Hill, who surprised everybody with the one and WOOOOO!iest one and WOOOOO! of his career: he went 89 yards — his career long — for a touchdown.  Chelsea lined up for the extra point, but Mason was a bit jumpy, so there was a flag for offsides; Chelsea again lined up for the extra point, and Mason was again a bit jumpy, so there was another flag for offsides.  The second penalty put the ball on the half-yard line, and even Republicans and Democrats agree: that’s an extremely cordial invitation for a two-point conversion.  Chelsea accepted the invitation, and Roberts carried the ball for the conversion to make the score 22-7.

Evan Grau and Kyle Coburn are the ohms to Mason’s current.

Gravity is a harsh mistress.

The Chelsea defense is both immovable and irresistible.

That touchdown got Mason all riled up, and the Ersatz Bulldogs drove for a touchdown to pull back within eight points with over eight minutes to go; those with advanced football degrees know that a eight-point lead can be erased pretty quickly, so Chelsea took over with the intention of killing a little time on its way to a score.  The drive started well, with Hill producing two double-digit rushes; unfortunately, it soon bogged down, and Chelsea punted the ball away with five minutes left in the game.  Mason took over at its own 13 and began its march to the other end of the field; it was a ponderous march, once threatened by a fourth and 10, but it didn’t stop until Mason scored a touchdown with only 37 seconds left in the game.

Ah, but remember the two-point conversion Mason handed to Chelsea on a twice-offsides platter?  That meant Mason had to go for two just to tie the game, and Chelsea didn’t gift Mason any real estate to make it easier; on the conversion attempt, Mason ran to the left and, as it turned out, a bit backwards as well: Chelsea tackled the ballcarrier for a loss to keep Mason out of the end zone.  The failed conversion left Chelsea a two-point lead, and only an onside kick stood between Chelsea and a tasty, tasty win.  The onside kick was recovered by Chelsea, and the Genuine Bulldogs buried the memory of the 2002 loss as they celebrated their 22-20 victory and their third consecutive district championship.

Leftovers:

• For the third time this season, Nick Hill rushed for more than 300 yards; this time, he rushed 37 times for 317 yards and two touchdowns.
• Starting safety Cody Adams broke his leg in practice; he watched the game from a wheelchair on the sideline.
• A special guest spoke to the players after the game: current Denver Bronco tight end — and former Bulldog — Tony Scheffler.  The Broncos had played on Thursday night, so Scheffler was able to make the trip to Mason to watch Chelsea’s game on Friday.

Cody Adams holds the district championship trophy.

Former Bulldog and current Denver Bronco Tony Scheffler talks to the team after the game.

Varsity 2008 record: 8-2 (6-2 SEC)

Though Chelsea’s thrilling overtime victory over Bedford in week 9 kept its hopes alive for a home playoff game, its unexpected loss to Tecumseh in week 8 still left some doubt as to the location of its first-round playoff game.  But to the delight of everybody who wasn’t signed up to work the concession stand, the Bulldogs’ 7-2 record was enough to keep Jerry Niehaus Field alive for another week; however, to the dismay of everyone who likes a little variety, the week 10 opponent would be a familiar face: the Milan Big Reds.  (Also, to the dismay of everyone who likes a little candy, the game would be played on Halloween.)

Though Milan departed the Southeastern Conference after the 1999 season, the series continued as the schools met at the end of the regular season six out of eight years.  Chelsea dominated the nonconference matchups, winnng all six games; perhaps due to this imbalance and to Chelsea’s penchant for playing larger schools, the series ended after a 20-7 Chelsea win in 2007.  Few expected to see Milan again for at least a few years … until the playoff system worked its wacky All The Old Familiar Teams magic — remember last year’s SEC-ful playoffs? — and sent the Big Reds back to Chelsea.

Milan no longer had its Studly Stud McStuderson 2,000-yard running back Ron Spears, who had the audacity to graduate; still, they were not without a Studly Stud: this year’s was David Box, a defensive lineman and fullback (and future Western Michigan Bronco) who has caused mass chaos by accidentally blocking the sun and casting a terrifying shadow over southeastern Michigan.  (He would have cast a shadow over northern Ohio, too, but everybody knows the sun doesn’t shine in Ohio.)  His presence on the defensive line provided one of the key matchups for the game: the Really, Really Big Red defensive line against the really, really prolific Bulldog running game.

Chelsea took the opening kickoff and moved quickly inside the 10 yard line, and it looked like Chelsea would take an early lead; however, like a panda bear in captivity, looks can be deceiving: on fourth and three from the nine, Milan intercepted the ball to end Chelsea’s scoring threat.  Actually, the Big Reds did more than just end the Bulldogs’ scoring threat; after the offense moved the ball past midfield, Milan running back Demetrius Love showed the end zone a little love on a 42-yard touchdown run to give his team a 7-0 lead.  Chelsea also crossed midfield on its next possession, but its big play was a punt: Michael Roberts put the ball where it needed to be, and the Bulldogs managed to down it at the one.  But Milan didn’t mind the cramped quarters; the Big Reds moved the ball briskly away from danger and soon found themselves at their own 40 … after which they found themselves in Chelsea’s end zone thanks to a 60-yard pass.

Where’d Steven O’Keefe go?  Why, he’s right behind you!

Nick Hill has that hippity-hop…

…And Chad Schiller has that stoppity-stop.

Facing an unsettling 14-point deficit, the Chelsea offense finally took offense at Milan’s winning ways; they cut Milan’s lead in half with a six-play drive featuring five runs by Nick Hill, the last of which was a 34-yard touchdown run.  With the Bulldogs gaining steam, the teams lined up for Chelsea’s kickoff … and then, with 9:17 to play in the second quarter, the field looked something like this:

That’s right: before Roberts could kick the ball, the stadium lost power, plunging players and spectators alike into darkness and hilarity.  (Why do I say hilarity?  Well, because when the crowd responds to a power outage by cheering and waving cell phones like lighters at an Air Supply concert, I think it’s pretty hilarious.)  The teams went to the locker rooms, several vehicles used their headlights to illuminate the walkways around the stadium so the spectators could move around safely, and everybody waited patiently for some word concerning the fate of the game.

When the power goes out, cheerleaders light up their own lives.

If this were TV news, their voices would be altered, too.

Eventually, principal Julie Deppner provided that word: a fuse had blown in a transformer in the school, and the city was working to fix the problem.  Finally, after an hour and a half, the lights came back on, and it was announced that the game would begin after a 15-minute warmup … but with one small change: the lengthy intermission would serve as a crazy-long halftime, and the break between the second and third quarters would be a mere three minutes.

After the eternal halftime, the Big Reds took the kickoff and held the ball for over seven minutes as they drove down inside the 10; however, the Chelsea defense pushed back, and Milan was left with a field goal attempt on fourth down from the 15.  But that didn’t go so well; the kick sailed wide left, and Chelsea took over with two minutes left in the half.  Things were looking good after Roberts threw to Steven O’Keefe for a 41-yard gain, but a late sack forced Chelsea to rush the kicking unit onto the field for a 50-yard field goal attempt; with time nearly expired, Roberts put his foot into the ball and launched a kick that narrowly cleared the crossbar, bringing Chelsea within four points at the end of the first half.

When push comes to shove, Tim Rosentreter will push and shove.

Riley Feeney doesn’t have time for you right now.

This play is not long for this world.

The third quarter didn’t start well for the Bulldogs, as they had to kick three times: Roberts’ first kickoff went out of bounds and — after Milan chose not to take the ball, but to have Chelsea kick again — the Bulldogs were offsides on the second kick, and the penalty pushed them back to the 30 to kick yet again.  Much to Milan’s chagrin, the third kick was a good one, and the Big Reds ended up a few yards shy of where they would have been had they taken the ball the first time.

After that burst of oddity, the game settled down, and the teams traded punts throughout the third quarter.  But then on a fourth and one at the beginning of the fourth quarter, Hill carried the ball not just for one yard, but for 33 yards and a touchdown; with that score, Chelsea took its first lead of the game, 17-14.  That score also energized the defense, and Milan went three and out; to make matters worse for the suddenly-reeling Big Reds, their punt became a bit disoriented and sailed out of bounds after traveling only 16 yards.  Chelsea took over inside the 30 and made it count: on third down, Roberts hit Michael Lenneman with a 28-yard touchdown pass to extend the Bulldogs’ lead to 10.

If he were a lumberjack, he’d be yelling “Timber!”

This sight never gets old.

You can be tackled, or you can give him the football.  It’s your choice.

Milan, still wondering how that 10-point deficit got there, again went three and out, and Chelsea got the ball at midfield; however, the Bulldogs also went three and out, and Milan got the ball back with under six minutes to play and an increasingly desperate need to score.  But there was no relief for the desperation as the Big Reds went four and out and handed the ball back to the Bulldogs, who, in turn, handed the ball back to Hill; three plays later, he scored from the nine, and Chelsea’s lead was 17 with under three minutes to play.  With one more chance to do anything, Milan again went four and out, and Roberts took a knee to seal a 31-14 victory.

Leftovers:

• The Milan defense held Chelsea scoreless for the first 15 minutes of the game, but that’s okay: the Chelsea defense held Milan scoreless for the last 35 minutes of the game.
• Nick Hill had a fairly typical game (27 carries for 163 yards and 3 touchdowns), but in a bit of a change from recent weeks, the Bulldogs also had a passing game: Michael Roberts completed 10 of 13 passes for 130 yards and one touchdown.
• The lengthy delay was a little disorienting: near the end of Milan’s first drive after the game resumed, Chelsea coach Brad Bush took a timeout with two minutes to play in the second quarter because he wanted to save time for his offense.  That makes all kinds of strategic sense … except thanks to the 105-minute delay, I thought the game was approaching the end of the third quarter, and I was baffled by Bush’s choice to take a timeout at that point in the game.  After a moment, I realized it was only the second quarter, and it all made sense.

Next week:
Chelsea faces the Other Bulldogs of Mason; the game is in Mason on Friday at 7:00.