Varsity 2008 record: 9-3 (6-2 SEC)

In the Chelsea football coaches’ office, there is a small hand-painted sign with a simple but meaningful four-word message: Friday night means football.  From August through November, that message drives the weekly routines of thousands of high school football players in Michigan; from the beginning of Monday practice through the inimitable moment at which those athletes run onto the field against the backdrop of a setting sun and amidst the spectacle of what is a major community event in many towns, those four words are the motto that brings into profound focus the motivation for enduring the hottest preseason two-a-days and the coldest postseason practices.  Why spend hours under the scorching August sun?  Because Friday night means football.  Why toil in a frigid November snow flurry?  Because Friday night means football.  There is no other sport with such a singular weekly focal point; there is no other sport that defines one night so irrevocably as its very own.  In autumn there is no ambiguity; there is only one night with one unmistakable meaning: Friday night means football.

Sadly, not all schools observe this important tradition; sometimes an opposing team forces a change to the schedule, choosing to play not on Friday night but instead on Saturday afternoon.  Earlier this decade it was Farmington Hills Harrison forcing Chelsea to alter its calendar; this year, in the state regionals, it was a team the Bulldogs had never before faced in football: Inkster.  And if that wasn’t bad enough for all us Friday night folk, the situation got a little more confusing: a facilities issue prompted Inkster to move the game to Romulus, a city which is neither Inkster nor Chelsea.  (Hey, all the cities blur together when you get east of Ypsilanti.  If these things aren’t spelled out, I get lost.)

Look!  His hair is cold!  It’s turning blue!

The 2008 season marked Chelsea’s third consecutive trip to the state regionals; unfortunately, the two previous trips didn’t end well, and Chelsea was still looking for its first consecutive regional championship.  This game didn’t promise to be any easier than the last two: not only was it an away game — the previous two had been home games — but Inkster came into the game on a nine-game winning streak, including two playoff wins by a combined score of 102-0.  In other words, the Inkster Vikings were as good at football as the Actual Vikings were at colonizing Europe.  (They weren’t as good at football as the Actual Vikings were at wearing amazing horned helmets, because as disappointing as it may be, it turns out the Actual Vikings didn’t really wear amazing horned helmets.  What would the Purple People Eaters think of that?)

On a cold November day under cold gray November skies and in a cold November rain/sleet/snow mix — did I mention it was November? — Chelsea kicked off to Inkster, and the Vikings held onto the ball for the next three hours.  Well, okay, it wasn’t three hours, but it felt like three hours: they held the ball for eight minutes — a full one-sixth of the game — before colonizing the end zone to take an early 8-0 lead.  Chelsea handed the ball 12 times to Nick Hill as part of a 13-play drive, but the drive stalled just outside the Inkster 20; the 40-yard field goal attempt fell short, and Inkster took over at the 20.  But if the Vikings’ first drive was crazy long, their second drive was crazy short: they went three and out and were forced to punt.

Tyler Fischaber would like to show you to the turf.

Pat Dignan doesn’t feel cold; he feels only wins and losses.

“I don’t care what Ebert & Roeper said; I’m giving Quantum of Solace two thumbs up.”

Once again, Chelsea put together a strong drive, using 11 plays to move inside Inkster’s 20; once again, the drive stalled, this time on a fumble at the 15.  To make matters worse, Inkster returned the fumble inside the Chelsea 40 and took full advantage of the Bulldogs’ gift by scoring a touchdown to go up 16-0 with a minute and a half left in the second quarter.  That proved to be enough time for Chelsea to move to the Inkster 15 but the Vikings intercepted a second-down pass at the goal line with 12 seconds left to end the threat and the half.

The Bulldogs received the ball to start the second half, but this time they didn’t get a chance to move the ball into Inkster territory: Hill took the kickoff 81 yards for a touchdown to cut Inkster’s lead down to 16-6.  After that burst of excitement, the teams settled down into a quarter’s worth of relatively short possessions that were as threatening as a lethargic kitten sitting on a stack of Barry Manilow albums; neither side came close to scoring, and Inkster took its 10-point lead into the fourth quarter.

Nick Hill doesn’t appreciate your invading his personal space.

When the coach says “huddle,” this isn’t what he means.

Early McGowan will be on time.  You can count on it.

The first half of the fourth quarter was consumed by another three-hour Inkster drive, but this time the drive ended in a punt.  Chelsea took over on its own eight and moved all of seven yards before fumbling the ball away; with five and a half minutes to play and Inkster on Chelsea’s 16, the Bulldogs’ chances for a comeback seemed faint at best.  But the Vikings helped turn the volume back up when they fumbled the ball right back, and Chelsea had four minutes to put a dent in Inkster’s lead; three minutes later, that’s exactly what they did thanks to a 13-yard Michael Roberts touchdown run.  The extra point cut Inkster’s lead to three, but that would still be a difficult lead to overcome: there was only a minute left in the game, so the Bulldogs’ hopes rested on a successful recovery of their onside kick — something that happens only about 21 percent of the time in the NFL.

“Hey!  Look up there!  It’s a Northwest jet!”

When Early McGowan and George Clark are happy, you’d better be happy, too.

Cody Schiller really, really likes snow.

After the … wait, what?  The Bulldogs recovered the onside kick?  Hey, they did!  How about that.  So, as I was saying, after Chelsea recovered the onside kick, the Bulldog offense took the field with a chance to pull even — or to take the lead.  It didn’t look good at first: three no-gainers left Chelsea with a fourth and 10.  But Roberts threw to Jake Mantel for the first down, and the Bulldogs had a first down and another chance; three plays later, Roberts lofted a pass to Steven O’Keefe at the five, and it looked like Chelsea would score the winning touchdown … until an Inkster defender reached O’Keefe right after the ball did: his bone-crunching, teeth-rattling hit knocked the ball loose, leaving Chelsea with another fourth down.  Roberts’ final pass fell incomplete, and Inkster took over with eight seconds left; one knee later, Chelsea’s season came to an end with a 13-16 loss.

Leftovers:

• Each of Chelsea’s three first-half drives made it inside the Inkster 25, but each of those three drives ended with zero points (missed field goal, fumble, interception).
• Inkster entered the game with a high-flying reputation for scoring enough points to bail out Wall Street: the Vikings had scored over 40 points in six games to that point.  But the Chelsea defense not only held them to 16 points, but also held them scoreless in the second half.
• Nick Hill rushed 35 times for 182 yards, giving him a season total of 279 rushes for 2,090 yards and 24 rushing touchdowns (along with two kick returns for touchdowns); that gives him an average of 7.5 yards per carry.  His all-purpose yardage total was 2,773, which accounts for a little over half of Chelsea’s total all-purpose yardage (5,193).
• Full photo gallery.

Next week:
I’m sorry; your call cannot be completed as dialed.  Please check the number and call back next August.

Varsity 2008 record: 9-2 (6-2 SEC)

Chelsea’s high-voltage fuse-blowing pun-inducing win over Milan sent the Bulldogs on to face the Bulldogs.  But as much fun as an intrasquad playoff scrimmage sounded, the Other Bulldogs weren’t from Chelsea; instead, they were from Mason.  (Also, Mason Bulldogs are blue and red, which just makes them purple waiting to happen.)

Those who recall a bit of the history of Chelsea football will remember Mason as a fairly regular nonconference opponent; the two teams met 14 times between 1972 and 1997, and the series ended up a remarkably even 7-7.  Mason disappeared from Chelsea’s regular-season schedule after the 1997 season, never to be seen again … until the whimsical hand of the MHSAA playoffs reunited the teams in 2002 (which was a nice change from its habit of scheduling conference teams).  As most every Chelsea fan remembers, being reunited didn’t feel so good for Chelsea; on a miserably cold and snowy night in Mason, the Ersatz Bulldogs used a fourth-quarter fumblerooski to score the winning touchdown, and the Genuine Bulldogs went home with a mild case of frostbite and a severe case of That Was Annoying.

In a binary football game, this would be the two yard line.

Chelsea had much higher hopes for the 2008 Meeting of the Bulldogs, but one thing would be the same: the game would again be at Mason thanks to the MHSAA playoff points formula, which used its mysterious powers to deem Mason the better set of Bulldogs.  They weren’t that much better, though: the difference was a mere .112 (89.778 to 89.666), which, in terms of playoff rankings, made Mason better then Chelsea only to the degree that Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups are better than Reese’s Pieces.  That slim difference led everybody to anticipate a tasty, tasty clash not of chocolate and peanut butter, but of two good teams.

Like any good host would do, Mason let Chelsea have the ball first, and Chelsea express its gratitude by moving efficiently inside Mason’s 30.  The drive stalled before Chelsea could do any damage, but Mason punted the ball right back after a swift three and out; again, Chelsea moved the ball efficiently, and this time the drive didn’t stall: Nick Hill took the ball in from the three to give Chelsea a 7-0 lead.

Nick Hill cuts like a knife through the tension of your defense.

How happy is George Clark?  So happy!

Mason’s offensive woes continued with another three and out, but Chelsea couldn’t get past the 50; after a solid Michael Roberts punt pinned Mason at its own 13, Mason finally found offensive success.  But that success didn’t extend all the way down the field: Mason had a first and goal but failed to reach the end zone, so the kicker came out to cut into Chelsea’s lead.  There was, however, one small problem: the ball didn’t actually go through the uprights, and Chelsea’s lead stayed right where it was.

…But it didn’t stay there for long.  On second and 5 from the Mason 44, Roberts lofted a 44-yard touchdown pass to Jake Mantel to double Chelsea’s lead.  Mason pushed the ball past midfield but soon had to punt, and Chelsea took over with two minutes left in the half and a chance to extend its lead; however, Roberts’ 37 yard field goal fell short, leaving Chelsea’s halftime lead at 14.

It’s a good thing for Michael Roberts that this isn’t the comic strip Peanuts.

Kevin Rosentreter only has eyes for you.

Mason got the ball to start the second half with the goal of reducing Chelsea’s lead with some sort of score; however, a three and out isn’t worth any points under current football rules, so that goal went unfulfilled.  But Chelsea responded with its own three and out, and a 36-yard punt return gave Mason the ball inside Chelsea’s 20.  This time Mason accomplished its goal with a one-yard touchdown run, and Chelsea’s lead was down to seven.

Both Chelsea and Mason staged drives that chewed up the rest of the third quarter but resulted in no points, and early in the fourth quarter, Mason punted the ball away.  Chelsea took over on its own 11 and handed the ball to Hill, who surprised everybody with the one and WOOOOO!iest one and WOOOOO! of his career: he went 89 yards — his career long — for a touchdown.  Chelsea lined up for the extra point, but Mason was a bit jumpy, so there was a flag for offsides; Chelsea again lined up for the extra point, and Mason was again a bit jumpy, so there was another flag for offsides.  The second penalty put the ball on the half-yard line, and even Republicans and Democrats agree: that’s an extremely cordial invitation for a two-point conversion.  Chelsea accepted the invitation, and Roberts carried the ball for the conversion to make the score 22-7.

Evan Grau and Kyle Coburn are the ohms to Mason’s current.

Gravity is a harsh mistress.

The Chelsea defense is both immovable and irresistible.

That touchdown got Mason all riled up, and the Ersatz Bulldogs drove for a touchdown to pull back within eight points with over eight minutes to go; those with advanced football degrees know that a eight-point lead can be erased pretty quickly, so Chelsea took over with the intention of killing a little time on its way to a score.  The drive started well, with Hill producing two double-digit rushes; unfortunately, it soon bogged down, and Chelsea punted the ball away with five minutes left in the game.  Mason took over at its own 13 and began its march to the other end of the field; it was a ponderous march, once threatened by a fourth and 10, but it didn’t stop until Mason scored a touchdown with only 37 seconds left in the game.

Ah, but remember the two-point conversion Mason handed to Chelsea on a twice-offsides platter?  That meant Mason had to go for two just to tie the game, and Chelsea didn’t gift Mason any real estate to make it easier; on the conversion attempt, Mason ran to the left and, as it turned out, a bit backwards as well: Chelsea tackled the ballcarrier for a loss to keep Mason out of the end zone.  The failed conversion left Chelsea a two-point lead, and only an onside kick stood between Chelsea and a tasty, tasty win.  The onside kick was recovered by Chelsea, and the Genuine Bulldogs buried the memory of the 2002 loss as they celebrated their 22-20 victory and their third consecutive district championship.

Leftovers:

• For the third time this season, Nick Hill rushed for more than 300 yards; this time, he rushed 37 times for 317 yards and two touchdowns.
• Starting safety Cody Adams broke his leg in practice; he watched the game from a wheelchair on the sideline.
• A special guest spoke to the players after the game: current Denver Bronco tight end — and former Bulldog — Tony Scheffler.  The Broncos had played on Thursday night, so Scheffler was able to make the trip to Mason to watch Chelsea’s game on Friday.

Cody Adams holds the district championship trophy.

Former Bulldog and current Denver Bronco Tony Scheffler talks to the team after the game.

Varsity 2008 record: 8-2 (6-2 SEC)

Though Chelsea’s thrilling overtime victory over Bedford in week 9 kept its hopes alive for a home playoff game, its unexpected loss to Tecumseh in week 8 still left some doubt as to the location of its first-round playoff game.  But to the delight of everybody who wasn’t signed up to work the concession stand, the Bulldogs’ 7-2 record was enough to keep Jerry Niehaus Field alive for another week; however, to the dismay of everyone who likes a little variety, the week 10 opponent would be a familiar face: the Milan Big Reds.  (Also, to the dismay of everyone who likes a little candy, the game would be played on Halloween.)

Though Milan departed the Southeastern Conference after the 1999 season, the series continued as the schools met at the end of the regular season six out of eight years.  Chelsea dominated the nonconference matchups, winnng all six games; perhaps due to this imbalance and to Chelsea’s penchant for playing larger schools, the series ended after a 20-7 Chelsea win in 2007.  Few expected to see Milan again for at least a few years … until the playoff system worked its wacky All The Old Familiar Teams magic — remember last year’s SEC-ful playoffs? — and sent the Big Reds back to Chelsea.

Milan no longer had its Studly Stud McStuderson 2,000-yard running back Ron Spears, who had the audacity to graduate; still, they were not without a Studly Stud: this year’s was David Box, a defensive lineman and fullback (and future Western Michigan Bronco) who has caused mass chaos by accidentally blocking the sun and casting a terrifying shadow over southeastern Michigan.  (He would have cast a shadow over northern Ohio, too, but everybody knows the sun doesn’t shine in Ohio.)  His presence on the defensive line provided one of the key matchups for the game: the Really, Really Big Red defensive line against the really, really prolific Bulldog running game.

Chelsea took the opening kickoff and moved quickly inside the 10 yard line, and it looked like Chelsea would take an early lead; however, like a panda bear in captivity, looks can be deceiving: on fourth and three from the nine, Milan intercepted the ball to end Chelsea’s scoring threat.  Actually, the Big Reds did more than just end the Bulldogs’ scoring threat; after the offense moved the ball past midfield, Milan running back Demetrius Love showed the end zone a little love on a 42-yard touchdown run to give his team a 7-0 lead.  Chelsea also crossed midfield on its next possession, but its big play was a punt: Michael Roberts put the ball where it needed to be, and the Bulldogs managed to down it at the one.  But Milan didn’t mind the cramped quarters; the Big Reds moved the ball briskly away from danger and soon found themselves at their own 40 … after which they found themselves in Chelsea’s end zone thanks to a 60-yard pass.

Where’d Steven O’Keefe go?  Why, he’s right behind you!

Nick Hill has that hippity-hop…

…And Chad Schiller has that stoppity-stop.

Facing an unsettling 14-point deficit, the Chelsea offense finally took offense at Milan’s winning ways; they cut Milan’s lead in half with a six-play drive featuring five runs by Nick Hill, the last of which was a 34-yard touchdown run.  With the Bulldogs gaining steam, the teams lined up for Chelsea’s kickoff … and then, with 9:17 to play in the second quarter, the field looked something like this:

That’s right: before Roberts could kick the ball, the stadium lost power, plunging players and spectators alike into darkness and hilarity.  (Why do I say hilarity?  Well, because when the crowd responds to a power outage by cheering and waving cell phones like lighters at an Air Supply concert, I think it’s pretty hilarious.)  The teams went to the locker rooms, several vehicles used their headlights to illuminate the walkways around the stadium so the spectators could move around safely, and everybody waited patiently for some word concerning the fate of the game.

When the power goes out, cheerleaders light up their own lives.

If this were TV news, their voices would be altered, too.

Eventually, principal Julie Deppner provided that word: a fuse had blown in a transformer in the school, and the city was working to fix the problem.  Finally, after an hour and a half, the lights came back on, and it was announced that the game would begin after a 15-minute warmup … but with one small change: the lengthy intermission would serve as a crazy-long halftime, and the break between the second and third quarters would be a mere three minutes.

After the eternal halftime, the Big Reds took the kickoff and held the ball for over seven minutes as they drove down inside the 10; however, the Chelsea defense pushed back, and Milan was left with a field goal attempt on fourth down from the 15.  But that didn’t go so well; the kick sailed wide left, and Chelsea took over with two minutes left in the half.  Things were looking good after Roberts threw to Steven O’Keefe for a 41-yard gain, but a late sack forced Chelsea to rush the kicking unit onto the field for a 50-yard field goal attempt; with time nearly expired, Roberts put his foot into the ball and launched a kick that narrowly cleared the crossbar, bringing Chelsea within four points at the end of the first half.

When push comes to shove, Tim Rosentreter will push and shove.

Riley Feeney doesn’t have time for you right now.

This play is not long for this world.

The third quarter didn’t start well for the Bulldogs, as they had to kick three times: Roberts’ first kickoff went out of bounds and — after Milan chose not to take the ball, but to have Chelsea kick again — the Bulldogs were offsides on the second kick, and the penalty pushed them back to the 30 to kick yet again.  Much to Milan’s chagrin, the third kick was a good one, and the Big Reds ended up a few yards shy of where they would have been had they taken the ball the first time.

After that burst of oddity, the game settled down, and the teams traded punts throughout the third quarter.  But then on a fourth and one at the beginning of the fourth quarter, Hill carried the ball not just for one yard, but for 33 yards and a touchdown; with that score, Chelsea took its first lead of the game, 17-14.  That score also energized the defense, and Milan went three and out; to make matters worse for the suddenly-reeling Big Reds, their punt became a bit disoriented and sailed out of bounds after traveling only 16 yards.  Chelsea took over inside the 30 and made it count: on third down, Roberts hit Michael Lenneman with a 28-yard touchdown pass to extend the Bulldogs’ lead to 10.

If he were a lumberjack, he’d be yelling “Timber!”

This sight never gets old.

You can be tackled, or you can give him the football.  It’s your choice.

Milan, still wondering how that 10-point deficit got there, again went three and out, and Chelsea got the ball at midfield; however, the Bulldogs also went three and out, and Milan got the ball back with under six minutes to play and an increasingly desperate need to score.  But there was no relief for the desperation as the Big Reds went four and out and handed the ball back to the Bulldogs, who, in turn, handed the ball back to Hill; three plays later, he scored from the nine, and Chelsea’s lead was 17 with under three minutes to play.  With one more chance to do anything, Milan again went four and out, and Roberts took a knee to seal a 31-14 victory.

Leftovers:

• The Milan defense held Chelsea scoreless for the first 15 minutes of the game, but that’s okay: the Chelsea defense held Milan scoreless for the last 35 minutes of the game.
• Nick Hill had a fairly typical game (27 carries for 163 yards and 3 touchdowns), but in a bit of a change from recent weeks, the Bulldogs also had a passing game: Michael Roberts completed 10 of 13 passes for 130 yards and one touchdown.
• The lengthy delay was a little disorienting: near the end of Milan’s first drive after the game resumed, Chelsea coach Brad Bush took a timeout with two minutes to play in the second quarter because he wanted to save time for his offense.  That makes all kinds of strategic sense … except thanks to the 105-minute delay, I thought the game was approaching the end of the third quarter, and I was baffled by Bush’s choice to take a timeout at that point in the game.  After a moment, I realized it was only the second quarter, and it all made sense.

Next week:
Chelsea faces the Other Bulldogs of Mason; the game is in Mason on Friday at 7:00.

Freshmen: d. by Bedford 0-29
JV: d by Bedford 15-38

Varsity 2008 record: 7-2 (6-2 SEC)

Since Bedford joined the SEC in 2002, Chelsea has never had a problem with the Kicking Mules; through 2007, the Bulldogs held a 6-0 record with an average margin of victory of almost 22 points.  In other words, Chelsea has never lost to Bedford, and aside from a 14-0 win in 2002, it hasn’t really been close.  This winning streak has been aided by Bedford’s string of losing seasons; the last winning record for the Kicking Mules was 5-4 in 2002.

Even in that light, this year’s game posed a new challenge: Chelsea was coming off a surprising loss to then 2-5 Tecumseh, and Bedford had put together a strong 5-3 record.  Furthermore, Chelsea already had a playoff berth guaranteed, while Bedford needed to beat the Bulldogs to ensure its first playoff appearance since 1990.  A Chelsea victory would secure an SEC championship and keep alive the hopes for a home playoff game, but leading experts agree: needing a win just to make the playoffs is mighty strong motivation.

The night was notable for one other reason: it was the first time all season that the weather was anything other than good.  Through eight weeks, the worst Friday night weather had been cloudy with some chance of rain at Saline (and it never did rain that evening, unless you count the downpour of Saline touchdowns); however, when Bedford came to town, so did the cloud perspiration.  It wasn’t a full rainstorm, but it was a heavy enough mist to get everything wet.

Chinstrap?  Aaron Gates doesn’t need no stinkin’ chinstrap.

Mike Baker thinks he can sneak past Adam Taylor.

Chelsea won the coin toss and elected to receive the ball, and Bedford started the game like a team that really, really wanted to win: the kickoff was a squibby little thing bouncing here and there, and it confused the Bulldogs just enough to give Bedford time to recover the ball.  And if that wasn’t irritating enough, the Kicking Mules proceeded to drive for a touchdown; they went for two — which, along with the strange kickoff, led to some suspicion that they, like Tecumseh, didn’t have a kicker — and took an early 8-0 lead.  But the Bulldogs wanted to win a little, too, and they matched Bedford’s touchdown drive with one of their own, capped by a 22-yard Nick Hill touchdown run.  Since Chelsea has a kicker, there was none of this going for two business, so Bedford still had the lead; however, it was only a one-point lead, and studies have shown that one-point leads are the leading cause of gray hair in football coaches.

Bedford, taking sympathy on its coach and his hair, moved right back down the field and scored another touchdown; this time, the two-point conversion — more evidence of a missing kicking game — failed, giving the Kicking Mules a more hair-friendly seven-point lead.  Chelsea, determined to continue the Festival of Offense, put together another drive and, on the first play of the second quarter, Hill took the ball in from the three.  The extra point tied the game at 14, and after four consecutive scoring drives, the defenses were wondering if they had been invited to the game.

George Clark and the Chelsea defense don’t mind a little rain.

Michael Roberts takes a hit from the Headless Mule.

It turns out the defenses had been invited, but only for a little while; after Bedford and Chelsea traded three and outs, Bedford put together a one and WOOOOO! with a 40-yard touchdown pass … but the addition stopped at six when the two-point conversion failed again.  After that outburst, the defenses rejoined the party; both teams got the ball before the half ended, but neither one managed to score — though Bedford got inside the 10 before an illegal block pushed the ball back to the 20 — and the half ended with the Kicking Mules leading 20-14.

Chad Schiller carries the ball like the Three Tenors carry a tune.

Nobody gets lonely in Chelsea.

As it had at the start of the game, Bedford started the second half like a team that really, really wanted to win: the Kicking Mules staged a thoroughly impressive 93-play drive that took eight and a half minutes off the clock and put eight more points on the scoreboard.  With just over three minutes to play in the third quarter, things were looking great for The Team From Almost But Not Quite Ohio and not so great for the Bulldogs … until Chelsea answered with its own one and WOOOOO! thanks to a 60-yard touchdown run by Hill.  As if that wasn’t enough, Bedford fumbled the ball away on its own 25, and Chelsea just kept giving the ball to Hill until he scored (four plays later) on a one-yard run.  The extra point gave Chelsea fourteen unanswered points in two minutes, and the game was tied with a minute left in the third quarter.

Bedford loves Nick Hill…

…And Nick Hill loves the end zone. (But not on the same play.)

As the fourth quarter began, the teams traded punts … but then the Kicking Mules started to give Chelsea very unpleasant flashbacks to Tecumseh’s eternal game-winning touchdown drive.  They gained yard after yard and first down after first down — even converting a fourth down — and with under a minute to play, they had first and goal at the 10.  The flashbacks to the previous week’s loss were becoming more intense, and another late loss was beginning to look likely; however, with time winding down, Bedford faced a fourth and goal at the one yard line, and all the suspicions about their kicking game were confirmed when the Mules took the “Kicking” off their moniker — if you have no apparent kicking game, can you be called the Kicking Mules? — and left the offense on the field to try once more for the game-winning touchdown instead of taking a chance at the shortest field goal possible.  But there was one problem: Bedford didn’t wait for the official to put the ball in play, and the resulting penalty pushed the Not Kicking But Going For It Mules back from the one to the six.  With all the nice safe short-yardage running plays off the menu, Bedford’s last chance at a win in regulation ended in an incomplete pass, and all the people said hello, overtime.

Chelsea won the coin toss and elected to win; however, the referee said that wasn’t a valid option, so Chelsea decided to make Bedford take the ball first.  The Mules picked up where they left off, running the ball three times and getting down to the two yard line; yet again, given the choice between a short field goal and a maybe-touchdown on fourth down, Bedford eschewed the more likely scoring opportunity — an atypical choice for the team going first in overtime — and once again became the Going For It Mules.  This time the play was a run, but it ended in much the same futility as the last play of regulation: the ballcarrier was stopped for no gain.

Is Chad Schiller excitable?  I can’t tell.

Since Bedford scored no points, the Bulldogs simply had to score something to win the game … and that’s exactly what they did.  On first down, Roberts handed the ball to Hill, and he made sure there would be no need for the Kicking Bulldogs by taking it in for the touchdown; with that touchdown — Hill’s fifth of the game — Chelsea escaped with a 34-28 win.

We’re happy!  Well, most of us, anyway.

Either he’s overjoyed or he’s desperately trying to escape.

It seems fewer Bulldogs want to go to Kilwin’s this week.

Leftovers:

• The end of the 2008 freshman football season marked the retirement of longtime Chelsea coach Bill Bainton; at halftime, Bainton was recognized for his 28 years of service to Chelsea football.
• Chelsea won the game despite being outdone in nearly every statistic, most notably total yardage (404 to 281) and first downs (22 to 11).
• Against Bedford, Nick Hill rushed for 236 yards and five touchdowns on 25 carries.  His season totals: 1,428 yards on 180 carries for an average of 7.9 yards per carry.  His per-game average is listed at 158.7, but that’s an average for nine games played; since Hill played only eight — he sat out the Northville game — his per-game average is actually 178.5.  When it comes to scoring, he had a total of 20 touchdowns: 19 rushing and one kickoff return.

Next week:
The playoffs begin!  In the first round, Chelsea faces the Big Reds of Milan; the game is in Chelsea on Friday at 7:00.

Freshmen: d. by Tecumseh 6-42
JV: d. by Tecumseh 27-30

Varsity 2008 record: 6-2 (5-2 SEC)

The 2007 football season was a wild ride for Tecumseh; as they adjusted to a new coach, the Indians started the season with three consecutive losses — the last of which was a 26-41 loss to Chelsea — but followed those losses with six consecutive wins to qualify for the playoffs.  But the first round of the playoffs brought Tecumseh back to Chelsea for a rematch, and the Indians’ season ended with a 14-46 loss.  Still, the surprising six-game winning streak prompted hope for another successful season in 2008.

That hope for 2008 wavered when the Indians opened the season by losing to Lincoln, reappeared when they defeated Huron in week 2, and disappeared completely when they lost four straight games to drop to 1-5.  They ended the losing streak by beating Dexter in week 7, but that brought them to Chelsea’s Jerry Niehaus Field at 2-5 and firmly out of playoff contention.  Between that and Tecumseh’s 6-game losing streak to Chelsea dating back to 2003, things just weren’t looking good.

Brian Bazydlo spends his free time with Paul Bunyan.

No, Grant Fanning doesn’t wish to share his footballs.  Get your own.

Jason Lindauer keeps a close eye on his players.

Chelsea, on the other hand, came into the game at 6-1 with plenty of confidence after two big wins over Adrian and Pioneer, two of the SEC’s strongest teams; those wins put the Bulldogs not just in the playoffs for the tenth straight year, but also in prime position to lock up another SEC championship with a win over the lowly Indians.  Of course, to secure that championship, Chelsea first had to contend with Tecumseh’s infamous Group Hug offense, which almost always starts with a formation that looks something like this:

As you can imagine, the offense is a nightmare for photographers, spotters and anyone else who has any interest in seeing something other than a roiling mass of 22 bodies.  So … really, anyone who has the blessing of sight.  But they still let Tecumseh use the offense anyway, so I had to try to get some pictures anyway.  Oh, and Chelsea had to try to stop Tecumseh, too.

Given the markedly different records of the teams, the common assumption was that Chelsea would win, and the beginning of the game seemed to confirm that assumption.  The Bulldogs received the opening kickoff and staged a quick three-play scoring drive capped by a 19-yard touchdown run by Nick Hill; the extra point failed, but Chelsea still had a lead, and clinical studies have shown that leads are good.  On the resulting kickoff, the Tecumseh return man let the ball hit the ground; as strange oblong objects are wont to do, it took an unexpected bounce, and Chelsea recovered the ball inside the 20.  The Bulldogs had to work a little harder this time, but Michael Roberts finally took the ball in from the one, and a successful extra point gave Chelsea a 13-point lead.

Michael Roberts doesn’t mind crowds.

This is how most Tecumseh plays end up.

Jake Mantel: the new jungle gym.

Tecumseh actually fielded the next kickoff, and the Group Hug showed signs of awakening; however, the affection ended on an incomplete fourth down pass just inside the Chelsea 40.  The Bulldogs started the drive well enough with a 16-yard run by Hill, but there was a fumble two plays later, and Tecumseh took the ball and ran with it because … well, that’s pretty much all the Tecumseh offense does, you know.  On fourth and five, the Indians decided to forgo the first down in favor of a 36-yard touchdown run; since there seems to be some sort of shortage of kickers in the Tecumseh area, they went for two, and Chelsea’s lead was down to 5.

The Bulldogs really truly wanted to offset Tecumseh’s touchdown with one of their own, but a three and out put a stop to those plans, and the Indians had the nerve to drive for another touchdown.  Another two-point conversion gave Tecumseh a 16-13 lead — its first of the game — and the Bulldogs were wondering why this game wasn’t going as planned.  It got better when Chelsea responded with a touchdown drive of its own — punctuated by a 16-yard pass to Michael Lenneman — and the Bulldogs regained the lead with two minutes to play in the first half.  The Indians, despite their Three Yards And A Cloud Of Ennui offense whose touchdown drives typically take two years, managed to move briskly down the field and inside the 10, but they couldn’t put the ball in the end zone; furthermore, their complete lack of a kicking game came back to haunt them as they settled for no points as the half ended.  The Bulldogs took a 20-16 lead into the locker room and hoped the second half would be more what they expected and less Tecumseh-y.

If you’re not careful, Joe Tripodi will go all Big Ten on you.
I’ve heard of a standing ovation, but what does a standing arm-cross mean?

Those hopes began to come true when Chelsea recovered a Tecumseh fumble and quickly moved the ball inside the five.  But the Bulldog offense couldn’t finish the drive, and after a sack on fourth down, Tecumseh took over at its own twelve.  Failing to score after having a first and goal always hurts, but it hurts even more when the other team gets all excited and takes the touchdown you thought you were going to get.  And it hurts even more when that touchdown comes on a huge 92-yard pass that comes on third and 14, which is exactly how Tecumseh scored after stopping Chelsea.  The two-point conversion failed, but Tecumseh still took a 22-20 lead, and the Bulldogs wondered if maybe a clerical error had given a 2-5 record to the wrong team.

George Clark doesn’t like playing from behind.

Why yes, Chris Ballow would love to dance.  How about the Touchdown Tango?

Okay, that’s just not fair.

Chelsea’s next drive went nowhere special, but that was okay: shortly after the punt, Tecumseh generously proceeded to throw a pass to Scott Rhodes, who definitely doesn’t play for the Indians.  The Bulldogs made that miscue count for plenty, too, as they drove down the field and scored on a 26-yard touchdown pass to Chris Ballow.  Chelsea’s two-point conversion — which was entirely for strategical and mathematical reasons, and not due to any weakness in the kicking game — failed, but with ten minutes to play, the lead was finally back in the right paws.

A touchback on the kickoff put Tecumseh at its own 20, and the Indians embarked on a quest to counter Chelsea’s touchdown.  A long quest.  Really, really long.  Seriously, it was crazy long.  The Bulldogs forced three fourth downs on that quest, but the Indians converted every last one of them, and after an eternal possession — well, it was eight minutes, but it seemed eternal — they scored to take a 28-26 lead with 1:45 to play.  Chelsea desperately needed a spark to have a chance to win the game, and Hill provided such a spark by returning the ball nearly to midfield; however, a few plays later, Tecumseh grabbed an interception of its own, and all Chelsea could do was watch the clock run down on a 26-28 loss.

Leftovers:

• When Chelsea has a bad week, it really has a bad week: all three levels lost to Tecumseh.  And the varsity and JV teams suffered similar lengthy-fourth-quarter-game-winning-touchdown-drive fates.
• After two consecutive school record-setting games, Nick Hill settled down a bit, rushing for 158 yards and one touchdown on 26 carries.

Next week:
Chelsea faces the Kicking Mules of Bedford; the game is in Chelsea on Friday at 7:00.

Freshmen: d.  by Pioneer 12-56
JV: d. Pioneer 31-27

Varsity 2008 record: 6-1 (5-1 SEC)

After beating the #2 Adrian Maples, Chelsea continued its 2008 Tour Of Single-Digit Teams with the #9 Ann Arbor Pioneering Pioneers of Pioneer.  The teams came into the game remarkably evenly matched: Chelsea was 5-1, its record marred only by a 14-34 loss to Saline; Pioneer, too, was 5-1, its record marred only by a 3-21 loss to Adrian.  Naturally, those losses provided a clear and indisputable clue as to the better team:

• Chelsea beat Adrian; Adrian beat Pioneer; therefore, Chelsea > Pioneer.

Of course:

• Pioneer beat Saline; Saline beat Chelsea; therefore, Pioneer > Chelsea.

Uh … so yeah, like I said, the teams came into the game remarkably evenly matched, and I don’t know anyone who would use foolishly compartmentalized comparisons to divine a hint of superiority in one of the teams.  Do you know anyone who would do that?  No, of course you don’t.

That’s the strangest pushup I’ve ever seen.

Kyle Whitley demonstrates the “Superhero Riding On Top Of A Moving Vehicle” pose.

Anyway, with the teams being so evenly matched and so prone to winning, the game promised to be a rollicking riot of football entertainment.  That entertainment would include Pioneer’s own Studly Stud McStuderson, Nader Furrha, another Donovan McNabby sort of quarterback fond of running around, throwing around and winning around; of course, Chelsea would be countering with Nick Hill, who set a school record a week earlier with 312 rushing yards against an Adrian defense not noted for giving up school records.  In other words, barring miraculous defensive performances, the best description of the evening was bound to be the same as the best description of the Adrian game: “Whee!”  (For those with a more defensive perspective, a better description would be “What just happened, and why is the referee holding his arms up in the air like that?”  But thanks to TV’s effect on sports — Ratings are down!  Change the rules so there’s more scoring! — defense just isn’t cool anymore.)

Jake Hash probably doesn’t have any cell reception right now.

“I don’t care what you say; I’m not going to sing the national anthem.”

It didn’t take long for that description to become accurate; in fact, it didn’t take any time at all.  A2P3’s kickoff sailed into the end zone for a touchback — which meant the clock didn’t run — and on the very next play, Hill broke free for a 58-yard gain; a few plays later, Michael Roberts took the ball into the end zone.  Pioneer’s first drive ended in a punt, and Chelsea continued its freewheeling ways with another touchdown by Roberts; not quite eight minutes into the game, Chelsea had a pleasantly surprising 14-point lead and one burning question: would it last?

“I know they do that in spy movies to see if anyone’s following them, but … well, this isn’t a spy movie, Michael.”

Well … given the talent level of the Fighting Purple Redundancies, of course it wouldn’t last.  Pioneer drove the ball 80 yards to cut Chelsea’s lead in half at the end of the first quarter — no, really, they scored with no time on the clock — and, after forcing Chelsea into a three and out, blocked Roberts’ punt and recovered the ball for another touchdown.  Just like that, even faster than Chelsea had put up its 14-point lead, Pioneer had erased it, and the game was far too exciting again.

Pioneer’s surge didn’t last long, though; after a 43-yard Michael Lenneman kickoff return set up Chelsea near midfield, the Bulldogs leaned heavily on Hill’s shoulders — five out of six plays featured Hill — as they drove for a touchdown to retake the lead.  Pioneer went back to its punting ways, and Chelsea continued its scoring ways, this time with a 14-yard touchdown pass from Roberts to Lenneman; the Bulldogs’ lead was back to 14, but that whole 14-Purple-points-in-under-a-minute thing back there in that last paragraph didn’t make me confident that this lead would last much longer.  But it did last the final few minutes of the first half — Pioneer traveled into Chelsea territory but couldn’t score before the half ended — so that’s something, anyway.

Randy Cox, apparently delirious over Chelsea’s 14-point halftime lead, forgets that Joel Boyce is actually his teammate.  And that it’s still halftime.

Neither rain nor hail nor dark of night nor offensive linemen shall keep Kevin Rosentreter from the quarterback.

It didn’t take long for half the lead to disappear pretty quickly after halftime; Pioneer received the kickoff, and on first down, Furrha got all McNabby with a 71-yard touchdown run.  Chelsea made an effort to respond, but Roberts’ 37-yard field goal attempt fell short, and Chelsea’s lead was still only seven points.  The Pioneers really truly wanted to tie the score, but they soon had to punt the ball away; however, though the Bulldogs managed to drive inside the 20, they couldn’t extend their lead at all, and the Pioneers got another chance to tie the score.  This time, they succeeded … but then they failed.  That may sound confusing, but it’s really quite simple; they drove 88 yards for a touchdown, but they missed one important detail: the extra point.  The wayward kick kept Pioneer in a one-point hole, and with six minutes to go in the game, that little detail seemed maybe sort of kind of a little important.

Dakota Risner has plans for you, and they don’t involve Michael Roberts or the football.

Feel the love!  Also, the turf.

Still, as important as that detail may have been, it wasn’t a big enough to detail to give Chelsea much peace of mind; a one-point lead can disappear in a hurry, so to minimize the worry and maximize the peace of mind, the Bulldogs wanted to score, and they wanted to drain as much time as they could in the process.  How do you do that?  By running the ball!  And who had already carried the ball 34 times for over 250 yards?  Why, Nick Hill!  So, when Chelsea faced a key third and one, the coaches decided to give the ball to the ever-reliable Hill, and that decision worked out pretty well: instead of simply gaining the short yardage necessary for the first down, Hill responded with a remarkable 42-yard run that brought the Chelsea crowd to its feet.  Why was it remarkable?  Well, take a look:

Hill broke through the left side of the line…

…and absorbed a big hit.

But Hill’s feet weren’t planted when he was hit, and the hit was low enough that it only knocked his feet out from under him.

So Hill put his hand out to keep from going down, got his feet back on the ground…

…and took off running as the defense said, “Wait … what?”

That run got the Chelsea offense all excited, and several plays later, Hill finished the drive by taking the ball in from the four.  After Roberts made the extra point, Chelsea had a much more comforting eight-point lead with two minutes to go; that little detail of the missed extra point now loomed extra large and purply for the Pioneers: even if they scored a touchdown, they’d have to go for two just to tie the game.  For a while, it looked like Pioneer might have a chance to go for two; Furrha threw the ball all over the field and managed to get the Pioneers inside the 10 with just under a minute to go.  But a sack and two incomplete passes — the last on fourth down — ended Pioneer’s hopes of a comeback, and Chelsea had only to kneel down once to finalize a 35-27 victory.

All he said was, “If you want to go to Kilwin’s, raise your helmet!”

With a smile like that, you’d think he just set a school record in a hard-fought victory or something.

Leftovers:

• Remember that school record Hill set against Adrian?  It lasted all of one week.  Hill rushed 40 times for 340 yards and two touchdowns to surpass his previous record by 28 yards.  That brought his two-week total to 662 yards rushing and 6 touchdowns on 64 carries.
• Pioneer’s failure to score at the end of the first half was punctuated by a bizarre sequence of events.  Coming out of its last timeout with 19 seconds left, Pioneer faced a third and 5; Furrha was sacked, and with no way to stop the clock, Pioneer was forced to rush to the line to get off one more play before time expired.  One of the Chelsea linemen had lost his shoe on third down, and in the rush between plays, he had no time to put it back on; instead, he threw his shoe as far down the field as he could before the snap.  The sight of an object flying out of the line confused a lot of people, but the Pioneer center snapped the ball anyway; somewhere around the same time as the snap, somebody — presumably the referee — blew a whistle for some unknown reason.  At the sound of the whistle, everybody — including Furrha holding the ball in the backfield — stopped and looked at the referee.  Though everyone had heard a whistle, the referee yelled at the players to continue the play, and one of the Chelsea linemen obliged by tackling Furrha to end the play.  Understandably, the Pioneer coaches were miffed, but the play stood, and that’s how the half ended.
• The Bulldogs were very good on third downs against Pioneer, converting them 70% of the time (7 of 10).
• It seems the Pioneer press box staff wasn’t too fond of the final score; before I could get the usual shot of the scoreboard, they turned it off, so all I could get was a shot of the blank scoreboard.

Next week:
Chelsea faces the Indians of Tecumseh; the game is in Chelsea on Friday at 7:00.