Chelsea faced Dexter in soccer. Dexter won. As a Chelsea partisan I do not enjoy typing that phrase, but sometimes I have to do so because it’s the truth.
…Except in football, where Dexter hasn’t defeated Chelsea since 1995, back when I was mumbleteen years old. Okay, now I feel better. Here are the photos.
On Saturday — the last day of the fair — I finally got a chance just to walk around the fair. It was a beautiful day.
As I was walking around, I saw Colors the Clown doing a show for the kids.
Chelsea has changed quite a bit since I was a kid (back in the 20th century?!), but it’s still a rural small town surrounded by farms, so the fair still has a significant focus on farming. Since a farm can be a foreign concept to many kids, it’s valuable to have that focus. Food exists before it’s in the grocery store, and it’s good to get a reminder of that fact every now and again.
Here we have future bacon lounging in one of the barns:
I realize that could also be future ham, but I like bacon more than I like ham.
The next barn had goats.
You might think that’s a conceited animal to go around calling itself Greatest Of All Time, but here’s an important detail: the animals were around long before a conceited professional athlete ruined the name.
That barn also had sheep.
That particular sheep was remarkably sociable. Or maybe it was hungry. Or maybe it was stealing watches and wallets. Would that make it a pickBAAAAAcket?
Speaking of sheep: another barn had sheep shearing demonstrations. I don’t mean there were people protesting the practice of sheep shearing — though I’m sure there are malcontents who would do just that — but rather there was a farmer shearing sheep where people could watch.
That gentleman has been shearing sheep for decades. The process proved to be very efficient, and when he was done he let the kids come up to feel the newly-shorn sheep.
While the kids were admiring the sheep’s new haircut, he explained that the greasy substance they felt on the sheep was lanolin. Or, in the native language of sheep, LAAAAAAAnolin.
If you’d like to see what sheep shearing looks like, here’s a short video:
One of the other great traditions of the Chelsea Fair is the fair parade. It seems to be longer than it was when I was a kid, but that just means it involves even more candy, so kids (and dentists) still enjoy it.
The parade marshal was the very cheerful owner of a local barbershop:
I’m pretty sure Gary doesn’t wear the old-timey barber gear on a normal workday, but his barbershop is wonderfully small-town and old-school.
As usual, the CHS marching band wasn’t playing when it marched past me:
A local church put its worship band on a wagon and entertained the crowd along Main Street:
The Lions — not the Detroit Lions — brought their disease-fighting air force:
The Beach Middle School band actually did play while they walked past me!
The fair parade is a happy time for everybody. Don’t believe me? Take a look:
If that’s not happy, I don’t know what happy is.
The 2011 Fair Queen was in attendance:
The CHS cheerleaders cheered for the crowd:
The Chelsea House Orchestra got out of the house and turned into the Chelsea Parade Orchestra for the afternoon:
Eventually, everybody’s favorite fair parade feature rolled by: the Jiffy Mixes truck!
The Jiffy truck is accompanied by friendly locals handing out free (FREE!) boxes of Jiffy Mixes:
Back when I was growing up, there was nobody handing out boxes. Instead, the truck driver threw them out his window. The newer method means a lot more people get boxes, but…well, I do miss the old method just a little bit.
The Jiffy Mixes folks did introduce something — or rather, someone — new this year:
That’s Corny, the new Jiffy Mixes mascot. The character was created when the company produced a new video to accompany its factory tour, and it proved popular enough to prompt a real-life Corny costume.
Finally, scattered throughout the fair parade are a bunch of demolition derby cars. The winners — not just the overall winners, but also the individual heat winners — get to ride in the parade with their thoroughly trashed but still victorious cars.
Remember the library-sponsored derby car?
Yes, that’s driver Kim Potocki on the library car. She drove the extraordinarily well-read car to a heat victory on Wednesday.
A relatively recent fixture of fair week in Chelsea is the Run for the Rolls. What’s the Run for the Rolls, you ask? It’s a set of two races — a 5k and a 1 mile — that take place Saturday morning of fair week. The 5k takes place in the fairgrounds earlier in the morning, and the 1 mile heads down Main Street immediately before the fair parade begins. Since the latter runs the parade route immediately before the very popular parade, it includes lots of spectators to cheer on the runners.
Oh, and if you’re wondering why it’s called the Run for the Rolls — after all, don’t people usually run to avoid getting rolls? — it got its name thanks to the Common Grill and its inconceivably delicious dinner rolls. If you haven’t had a Common Grill roll, you don’t know what rolls are. They’re all-caps GOOD.
I wasn’t able to photograph the earlier race at the fairgrounds, but since I was set up to shoot the parade, I was all set to shoot the 1 mile run down Main Street. Before the race started I was certain I knew who would be running in first place, and I was right.
Before you get too impressed at my prognostication skills, let me explain: Bryce, the runner shown above, finished second in the state as a junior in the 2010 cross country finals. It wasn’t hard to guess that he’d be leading a 1-mile run through Chelsea.
The race has become quite popular:
Because it’s a short race in a fun environment, it attracts lots of kids and families.
Wednesday night was the second night of the demolition derby. It also happened to be a day of spectacular weather. When I arrived to stake out my spot, there were beautiful storm clouds just past the fairgrounds.
Unfortunately for all of us spectators waiting for the derby to start, those weren’t the last storm clouds in the sky. Not long after I took that photo, the sky got angrier than Brian Kelly after another Notre Dame turnover. The result was a downpour accompanied by uncomfortably close lightning strikes and deafening thunder.
After taking shelter and enduring the storm, we were treated to more gorgeous clouds.
After a delay to let the storm pass, the derby started. It was a little muddier than usual thanks to the deluge, but it was still plenty of fun.
After a couple heats, yet another intense storm began to move into the area. For a while we were just past the edge of the storm, and the frequent flashes of lightning provided a spectacular backdrop for the derby. The following is one of my favorite photos I’ve ever taken, and it came courtesy of the fisheye lens I’d bought just a few days earlier.
A few minutes after I took that photo, the lightning strikes again became uncomfortably close, so I decided it was time to head to my car. This turned out to be wise: just as I reached my car, the heavens opened up yet again. I sat in my car for about fifteen minutes listening to the rain pelt my car and watching the lightning flash directly overhead with astounding frequency. To put my time to good use, I shot more photos through my windshield with my fisheye lens. These weren’t nearly as good as the above photo, but they’re still worth posting.
Sometimes the lightning was behind the clouds, making for eerie photos…
…and sometimes it was front and center.
When the rain let up a little bit, I headed home. But while the rain stopped by the time I got home, the divine fireworks were still going strong. When I arrived home, the lightning was over the field behind my house, so I spent a few more minutes getting photos of the remarkable storm. This was the best of the bunch:
Neither one of those light sources is the moon. Was it a ridiculous display of lightning? Yeah, it was ridiculous.
The Chelsea Fair doesn’t ease into the excitement: the first night of the fair features one of three nights of the fantastic demolition derby. I’ve been going to the demolition derby at the Chelsea Fair for as long as I can remember, and I wouldn’t think of missing it. Watching cars smash into each other until only one can move? I’M THERE. It’s like my life, but on purpose.
To keep speeds at a vaguely reasonable level, this classic old Dodge fire truck wets down the arena before the first heat.
As this is a sporting event in the United States of America, it’s prefaced by the national anthem. This respectful gentleman is one of the referees. When he’s not standing with his hat over his heart, he’s responsible for (among other things) enforcing the rules of the derby, keeping track of which cars have been disqualified and stopping the action when there’s a problem (usually either a fire or a dangerous part of a car lying loose in the arena).
This gentleman wanted the crowd to get excited.
The crowd obeyed.
Remember when the library had kids paint the car it was sponsoring? This was the final product.
Remember: reading can take you anywhere, kids — even into a demolition derby. That’s especially useful because you can’t actually drive in a demolition derby until you’re an adult. Sorry. We adults have to save some of the fun for ourselves, you know.
If you want pretty cars, a demolition derby is not the place for you.
This kind of fire is acceptable and, in fact, very common:
Last year one car had flames shooting out its exhaust pipes the entire time, and just a couple minutes into the heat the pipes were so hot they were glowing red. It was wonderful.
It’s also very common for radiators to break on impact:
As seen above, it’s often spectacular. It’s usually accompanied by a hilarious “FOOM!” sound that draws everybody’s attention.
See? It’s spectacular!
Some of the cars feature creative paint jobs:
You have to enjoy them before the heat starts, though, because the paint jobs inevitably get covered in layers of mud and destruction.
Yes, the red car was still moving at this point. You might be surprised at how much a car can be destroyed and yet still move. You can thank your local automotive engineer for that.
Not all radiator problems involve the “FOOM!” and the cloud of steam. Sometimes a pipe gets knocked off and starts spraying steam:
That would probably be a lot more amazing if it actually helped propel the car, but it doesn’t. It just looks cool. It might help take the wrinkles out of your clothes, too, if you could get your clothes near it. But if you think it’s a good idea to take your clean clothes into the middle of a demolition derby just to get rid of the wrinkles, you have far greater problems than wrinkles.
Here’s where that red car stopped moving:
Why did it stop? Well, take a look at the smoke pouring from its front tire. The tire let loose from the wheel, so the wheel was just spinning freely inside the tire. It’s like one of those silly spinner rims, but it’s at least 50% more functional.
It was a beautiful evening for the demolition derby:
Yes, I know you’re sad you weren’t able to be there. Maybe you shouldn’t let than happen next year, eh?
Hey, here’s a question: what happens when you get old and grow facial hair?
You get a white baird! Okay, okay. Sorry. That was terrible.
Seriously, though, occasionally there’s a fire that requires the firefighters’ attention. When that happens the car is disqualified and the driver exits to sympathetic applause. For some reason in this case the car was cleared to continue, but a few minutes later it required more attention from the firefighters:
At that point they deemed the car unfit to continue and the driver made a hasty exit.
What’s that? You’re disappointed to see the derby photos end? Why, you’re in luck: those aren’t the last derby photos! I spent the next evening at the derby as well, so there’s another set to come. Stay tuned.
The long-running much-beloved hyphenatedly-described Chelsea Community Fair is the officially unofficially official end of summer in Chelsea. It always opens during the day on Tuesday, but it doesn’t truly open until early evening, when the kids parade arrives at the fairgrounds after winding its way through the side streets of Chelsea.
The parade is led by the previous year’s fair queen.
Trailing the previous year’s queen and this year’s candidates is the middle school band.
After the band came the flood of kids. Seriously, it was a flood of kids. There were a lot of kids in the parade.
I can’t tell if he was happy to see me and waving to the camera or if he was saying “Oh, go fly a kite” and waving me away. I’m pretty sure it was the former, but…well, kids these days, right? Get off my lawn and all. (For the record: he was happily waving.)
They should make an adult version of that bike. We old folks like fun things, too!
The stream of kids seemed practically endless. That was partly because there were a lot of kids in the parade and mostly because there were even more mosquitoes out for dinner than there were kids in the parade.
I’ve long felt Barbie made it difficult for the average child to relate to her, what with her Cadillac SUV and her big dream house and whatnot. Shouldn’t there be a Studio Apartment Barbie who lives in an okay-but-not-luxurious apartment building and drives a 1998 Ford Escort with 190,000 miles on it? The whole world isn’t pink and rich, Barbie.
That child’s identity has been hidden to protect the innocent. Wait, what? You’re not buying that? Okay, fine. I didn’t notice until later that I’d timed the shot all wrong and obscured his face. But I’m including this photo to remind you that Cloudy With A Chance For Meatballs is one of the greatest kids books ever written, and that you should never ever mention the atrocity that was that awful movie by the same title. I prefer to believe the movie never existed. The book is fantastic, people. Stick with the book. Do it for the children. (Because, you know, it’s a kids book.)
When the parade arrived at the fairgrounds, there were more activities for the kids. One such activity was the trike pull.
This was just a fun not-for-competitive-profit activity, but the fair does have a competitive trike pull. I didn’t photograph it this year, so you’ll just have to show up to next year’s fair to watch it.
Stay tuned for more fair photos!
Chelsea’s Arctic Coliseum hosted a hockey skills clinic put on by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. This clinic was notable for two reasons:
1)My nephew signed up for it, and
2)Brian Rafalski was one of the instructors.
Who’s Brian Rafalski, you ask? Gasp! Obviously you don’t follow hockey here in Michigan. Brian Rafalski is a Dearborn native who was a part of three Stanley Cup-winning teams in his highly successful NHL career. The first two Cups were with the New Jersey Devils, and the last was with his hometown Detroit Red Wings. He retired from hockey this past spring.
So…yeah, a hockey skills clinic with Rafalski as an instructor is a Very Big Deal. The man knows his hockey skills.
This is my nephew.
It was a very humid day outside, and to make matters worse, a storm dumped a bunch of rain down during the clinic. What happens inside an ice arena when it’s absurdly humid outside?
Fog. Lots of fog. Visibility was good for a while after the Zamboni ran, but eventually the fog took over again.
Here, an instructor outlines a drill.
Here, an instructor listens as the other instructor outlines a drill.
That instructor is Brian Rafalski. Everybody say hi to Mr. Rafalski.
Here’s Mr. Rafalski with some of my family in the background.
Yes, I took that picture very much on purpose. Okay, so it’s not my family with Rafalski…but it’s my family in the same frame as Rafalski. Close enough.
Of course, I also got a photo of my nephew on the ice with Rafalski.
And finally, here’s the whole set of instructors.
I’ve made a bit of a Big Deal over Rafalski’s presence because he’s such a well-known hockey player, but I don’t want to shortchange the rest of the staff. The clinic was very (VERY) well-run, and that’s a credit to every man on the ice. If you have an FCA-run hockey camp in your area and you have a child who plays hockey, I’d encourage you to take advantage of it.
Freshmen: d. 20-35 by Novi
JV: d. 40-47 by Novi
Varsity 2011 record: 1-0 (0-0 SEC White)
The Enemy:
Opponent: Novi
Colors: Green and white
Color Scheme Attractiveness Rating (0-10, 10 being highly attractive): 0 — as a Michigan fan I’m morally obligated to ridicule this color scheme.
Mascot: Wildcats
Interesting Mascot Rating (0-10, 10 being highly interesting): 0 — you take the wildcat as a mascot to blend into the crowd, not to be interesting.
Last Year’s Record: 5-4
Previous Result vs. Chelsea: 14-28 loss (2006)
Last 10 years vs. Chelsea: 2-3
The Game:
First quarter:
Chelsea kicked off to Novi to start the game, but that’s where the generosity ended: Novi went three and out and attempted a punt. Attempted? Yes, attempted: Truman Hadley changed it from a punt to an unconditional surrender by blocking the punt. Unfortunately, Chelsea managed only a field goal. A few minutes later a short Chelsea punt set up Novi for a one-play, 30-yard touchdown drive. This gave Novi only a 6-3 lead thanks to a postmodern extra point that defied the social construct of the uprights. The rest of the quarter was a tug of war that nobody won.
Second quarter:
The quarter break rudely interrupted a promising Chelsea drive. The second quarter began with four consecutive carries by Berkley Edwards, the last of which was a 13-yard touchdown run. Chelsea kicker Zack Rabbitt embraced the objective truth of the uprights to give Chelsea a 10-6 lead. Dominic Davis ended another bout of tug of war with an interception to set Chelsea up inside the Novi 30. Faced with a fourth and goal from the one, Berkley Edwards again took the ball into the end zone, and Chelsea carried a 17-6 lead into halftime.
Halftime!
Om nom nom nom nom.
Twirler? Tightrope walker? You make the call.
Third quarter:
Chelsea’s first drive of the second half stalled, but that’s okay: Max Giller grabbed an interception and gave Chelsea the ball at the Novi 15. Can you guess who scored a touchdown on the next play? No, not Billy Sims, though that would have been exciting. Instead, Berkley Edwards carried the ball 15 yards for his third touchdown of the evening. The stout Chelsea defense forced another punt after a three and out, but a muff on the receiving end gave Novi another chance…to punt again after another three and out. More tug of war filled out the rest of the quarter.
Fourth quarter:
With Chelsea in Lloyd Carr’s Patented Protect The Lead mode, much of the fourth quarter was filled with tug of war. But with four minutes to play, Novi finally managed to return Chelsea’s opening-drive favor by blocking a punt. One minute later Novi finally found the end zone again. The two-point attempt failed, but Chelsea’s lead was down to 12. Chelsea fans grew a bit nervous when Novi recovered the ensuing onside kick, but the Bulldog defense shut down the drive in short order and handed the ball back to the offense with 2:10 to play. Andy Nelson’s 11-yard run gave Chelsea all the downs it needed to seal its season-opening 24-12 victory.
The Stats:
•Chelsea gained a total of 202 yards, 184 of which were on the ground.
•Berkley Edwards gained 119 yards and three touchdowns on 25 carries.
•The Chelsea defense held Novi to exactly zero third- and fourth-down conversions. Novi was 0-11 on third-downs and 0-3 on fourth downs.
The Images:
Max was concerned the lines on the field might not be straight. After close examination, he decided they were indeed sufficiently straight.
Chad’s number one! Chad’s number one!
On Novi’s first drive, Max Giller broke up a pass with a solid and perfectly-timed hit on the receiver. Here’s how it looked:
Hey, Truman: the old Bell slogan was “Reach out and touch someone,” not “Reach out and touch some punt.”
Michael and Sean sang a lovely duet.
Aaaaaaahhhhhh! The mosquitoes are atta…oh, wait. Those are just rubber pellets from the turf.
Apparently Novi plays helmet-optional football.
Together, Jack and Michael are a good time for lunch.
It seems Dominic has acquired the skill of levitation, too!
Dominic: this season’s most fashionable belt.
No, Dominic. That’s not what they mean by “hip hop”.
Jarred is good at avoiding the sackarazzi.
Novi must have taken a coffee break.
The Berkley Express: now arriving at the end zone.
Say hello to Cody’s not-so-little friend.
Happiness is an opening-week victory.
Where there is victory, there are cheerleaders.
Cody must have been watching an episode of the Cosby Show.
All the cool kids are having their pictures taken with Berkley.
Watch out, Coach Bush: I think Sean wants that trophy.
So…many…Bulldogs…
Next week:
Chelsea takes on the Trojans of East Lansing. The game is in Chelsea at 7pm on Friday.
Chelsea football hosted its annual preseason scrimmage. Like last year, the scrimmage also featured Grand Ledge, Monroe Jefferson and former SEC rival Pinckney.
It was a beautiful day for football. It was also a beautiful day to try out my new fisheye lens.
Whoa. That’s…uh…whoa. This could be fun.
Since it’s a scrimmage, there are coaches being all coachy all over the field.
I don’t know why Coach Fanning is smiling, but I think it’s because he sees my camera pointed at him.*
*(No I don’t.)
Jarred, one of the color-confused quarterbacks, used his foot to make sure the field had enough little rubber pellets.
Yeah, I guess he was throwing the ball, too. Whatever.
How would I rate this block? Well…
I’d give it a 10.
Here, a Bulldog ball carrier makes eye contact with a defender in an effort to humanize himself to the defender.
Unfortunately, his efforts to calm the defender’s violent human nature nature were unsuccessful.
Another Bulldog ball carrier had to fend off an insatiable autograph seeker.
Later, the Bulldog defense got to return the favor by swarming a Pinckney ball carrier.
I’m certain they got his autograph.
Do Bulldogs prowl? Because this one looks like he’s on the prowl.
Though he may be on the prowl, I think bulldogs tend to be on the jowl more than the prowl.
Hey, look! Another autograph session!
However, the Bulldogs continued to be stingy with their autographs.
Logan, satisfied with Jarred’s census of the little rubber pellets, concentrated on throwing the ball.
As the evening progressed, Alex improved his ability to avoid autograph seekers.
Meanwhile, I don’t know what noise was happening in the end zone, but one Bulldog didn’t want the other one to hear it.
Maybe Jim Tressel was giving a speech on ethics or something. If that was the case, I would’ve covered somebody’s ears, too.
I’ve heard of sleepwalking, but…sleeptackling?
Impressive.
Here’s a helpful tip: if you’re getting a little tired later in the game, just hitch a ride with somebody else.
